Open marriage has long been an unconventional social practice. Consensually establishing arrangements between partners that suit their needs is a wonderful thing, but historically, the topic has been too taboo to be discussed in public. Happily, attitudes about unconventional relationship methods have changed over the past few years.
A greater understanding of open relationships or marriages has emerged in society as a result of Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith’s willingness to be open about their open marriage, whether it be on Jada’s web series Red Table Talk or in magazine profiles. Other celebrities, such as Mo’Nique and her husband Sidney Hicks, Nico Tortorella, and Bethany Meyers, have also been vocal about their flexible marriage arrangements. But misconceptions continue to exist.
According to Lucie Fielding, a therapist, author, and sex educator, open marriages are mischaracterized in a variety of ways. One reason is that some individuals dismiss them as futile attempts to save broken relationships. Yet according to Fielding, that is not at all what open marriage is about.
She tells Cosmopolitan, “There’s sometimes this idea that you’re trying to correct something in your partner or your relationship. “That is not the issue. It involves being sincere, coming to an understanding, and developing alongside one another.
She claims that some people worry about open relationships because they worry about envy. Yet Fielding asserts that she thinks having jealousy is not necessarily a bad thing. The issue, according to her, is the existence of unprocessed jealousy. And by being open with one another, you can work through some of those emotions as a couple.
Many people believe that open marriage is an all-out free-for-all, she claims. Yet, the reality is that open marriages frequently contain a tonne of structure—just its structure that the partners have constructed together, customised to their particular needs, rather than a blind acceptance of the conventional structure that characterises monogamous relationships.
More frequently than not, the [open] couple sets limits on what can be done sexually, when it can be done, and with whom, according to Hall.
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There are many good reasons to explore alternative wants, quirks, or sexualities in a marriage. Perhaps a solution to the conflict between aromatic and also romantic partners is an open marriage. But it can be difficult to tell if an open marriage could be good for you if all of your relationships have been monogamous. Continue reading to learn everything there is to know about open marriages and why you might want to give one a try.
What is an open marriage?
An open marriage, according to Hall, begins with “two individuals who have joined together legally and spiritually” but who are willing to let one another have love or sexual relationships with other people.
That is merely the foundation of what we consider an open marriage to be, she adds. “Yet, each pair is given its own set of restrictions. The beauty of an open marriage is that the pair can decide for themselves what constitutes an open marriage.
According to her, all open partnerships, but especially open marriages, require strict boundary-setting as well as complete creative freedom. An open marriage’s limitlessness is built on a lot of sacrifices made by both partners, and everyone involved should be aware of the expectations.
An open marriage is what, then? bound or static. According to Fielding, “what openness implies is there’s a chance of closure,” which means that open marriages should be sensitive to the needs of both you and your spouse above all else. You two can immediately shut it down and resume your monogamous lifestyle if you two decide that the open marriage concept isn’t for you.
Opening up your marriage is not a quick fix for other relationship issues, just as having children is probably not going to mend a damaged relationship. Fielding cautions against using open marriage to mend a relationship. “It will only make the problem worse.”
Different Forms Of Open Marriage
There are countless methods to express your relationship in open marriages and partnerships in general because these types of unions are highly customised to your needs and the needs of your spouse or partners.
Fielding recommends the Relationship Anarchy Smorgasbord to clients so they may understand the variety of forms an open marriage could take. It’s essentially a giant flow chart filled with information about relationship traits, desires, and preferences—everything from how you prefer to be touched to how you relate financially or hierarchically. You and your partner(s) get to annotate the chart with your yeses, noes, and maybe-in-the-future responses, packing your figurative plate with everything you both agree would make your relationship the tastiest.
We are all familiar with the names of certain open marriage agreements. For instance, swingers are couples that decide to interact with other couples jointly. They may visit a swingers’ bar or party where they could meet other couples and switch partners. In that case, according to Hall, their rules can dictate that they can only interact with other couples as a couple and not individually. That still constitutes an open marriage, she claims.
According to Hall, some couples choose to have varying levels of openness in their relationships, allowing one partner to “have a girlfriend, boyfriend, or sexual partner on the outside” that the other isn’t at all involved with.
The married pair may share housing with one or more outside partners. She clarifies, “It might be what we think of as polygamy, but it’s not always. “A married couple could have a live-in girlfriend, boyfriend, or another romantic partner. The way the couple is defining it is accurate.
FAQs
What is allowed for a married couple?
A married couple could have a live-in girlfriend, boyfriend, or another romantic partner. The way the couple is defining it is accurate.
What is an open marriage?
An open marriage, according to Hall, begins with “two individuals who have joined together legally and spiritually” but who are willing to let one another have love or sexual relationships with other people.
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